PTSD and Having More Self-Compassion

PTSD and Having More Self-Compassion PTSD Coping Print PTSD and Self-Compassion Thinking More Positively About Yourself By Matthew Tull, PhD twitter Matthew Tull, PhD is a professor of psychology at the University of Toledo, specializing in post-traumatic stress disorder. Learn about our editorial policy Matthew Tull, PhD Medically reviewed by Medically reviewed by Steven Gans, MD on August 05, 2016 Steven Gans, MD is board-certified in psychiatry and is an active supervisor, teacher, and mentor at Massachusetts General Hospital. Learn about our Medical Review Board Steven Gans, MD Updated on June 24, 2019 Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder Overview Symptoms & Diagnosis Causes & Risk Factors Treatment Living With In Children Portra/Getty Images If you have a diagnosis of PTSD, you may struggle with self-compassion. The symptoms of PTSD can be very intense and can disrupt many areas of a persons life. As a result, you may experience feelings of guilt or shame, negative thoughts about yourself or feelings that youre worthless or a failure. These are common thoughts in people with PTSD - but theyre not true and they can make matters worse for you. Well share strategies for learning how to be more compassionate toward yourself. Why a Lack of Self-Compassion is Dangerous for People With PTSD A lack of self-compassion can have a huge impact on recovery from PTSD. Heres why: This way of thinking and living may decrease your motivation to continue through difficult moments in treatment.It may increase feelings of helplessness and hopelessness. For example, you might think, Im a failure, so whats the point with continuing with treatment?A lack of self-compassion can also bring about strong feelings of shame and guilt, which can make emotions even more difficult to manage.Finally, low self-compassion may lead to self-destructive behaviors. For example, you might begin to engage in deliberate self-harm as a form of self-punishment. Self-compassion can be difficult to increase, but its very important to do so. Below are some strategies for fostering a stronger sense of self-compassion as you deal with PTSD. How People with PTSD Can Increase Their Self-Compassion Fortunately, there are many ways to work on your sense of self-compassion. Here are some of the most effective strategies: Recognize that youre human.  If you set very high expectations that you cant meet, it is hard to feel compassionate about yourself. For example, you may have in your mind a timeline for improving your PTSD symptoms through treatment. But different people progress through treatment at different paces. Some people notice immediate gains, whereas others may take a little more time to notice benefits from treatment.  Setting very high standards or expectations increases the likelihood that you wont meet them, which can increase feelings of worthlessness, helpless, hopelessness, and failure. Recognize that youre human and that there are going to be times when you struggle or slip. This is normal and actually a positive part of the process of recovery. Those moments of struggle can help you identify areas you need to continue to work on, as well as help you find new coping strategies to prevent similar struggles in the future.Be mindful of negative self-focused thoughts.  Just because you have a negative self-focused thought doesnt mean its true. Our thoughts are largely the result of habit. We cant always trust them, and this is especially the case for negative thoughts about the self. Such thoughts generally only result in more shame and guilt.  Mindfulness can be a very useful strategy for managing negative thoughts. Being mindful of thoughts helps you take a step back from them, so you dont connect with them or buying into them as truth. This will decrease their intensity and, eventually, the frequency with which they occur.Practice self-care.  When people feel low self-compassion, theyre at greater risk for engaging in self-destructive behaviors or isolating themselves from social support. When youre experiencing low self-compassion, its very important to act in a way that is counter to those feelings. Remember: Even if we cant always control our thoughts or feelings, we always have some level of control over our behavior and the choices we make. So when youre f eeling worthless, act in a way that is opposite to that feeling by engaging in some kind of self-care activity. Do something nice for yourself and your body.  Self-care may be a difficult thing to do if youre having very strong negative thoughts or feelings. But even a small self-care activity can prevent these thoughts and feelings from taking hold. Acting as though you care about yourself can eventually bring about actual feelings and thoughts of self-compassion.Validate your emotions.  Another way to increase self-compassion is to validate your emotions. We dont experience emotions randomly. They are there for a reason. Emotions are our bodys way of communicating with us. When we beat ourselves up for having certain emotions, all we do is increase our emotional distress. Therefore, recognize that your emotions are important and reasonable. Try to listen to what your emotions are telling you and realize that its OK to have those emotions.Reduce self-destructive behaviors.  A lack of self-compassion can lead to self-destructive behaviors, such as deliberate self-harm, eating disordered behaviors (for example, binging and restricting) or substance use. These behaviors may be a form of self-punishment, and theyre very destructive if youre also dealing with PTSD. Although they may initially reduce your feelings of distress, in the long-term theyll only reinforce a sense of shame, worthlessness or helplessness. Its important to take steps to reduce these behaviors. Strategies focused on impulse control may be particularly useful for this.Practice acts of kindness.  If youre feeling like theres nothing you can do to help yourself, then make the choice to help others. Acting with compassion toward others can improve your own self-compassion. Plus, theres some evidence that helping others can facilitate  recovery from a traumatic event. Helping others by volunteering, for example, can improve your mood, provide a sense of accomplishment and agency and bring about a sense of worth.Recognize your accomplishments.  Finally, recognize what you have accomplished. Its especially important to recognize accomplishments you have made despite the experience of PTSD symptoms. Make note of difficult tasks you have accomplished or challenging situations you have successfully navigated. Recognize accomplishments both big and small. We often brush aside small accomplishments, but no accomplishment is too small when you have PTSD. Give yourself credit for showing strength and perseverance despite dealing with a PTSD diagnosis. Self-compassion is very important in recovering from PTSD. But its is also a very difficult thing to foster. Try out all of the strategies above and discover which combination of activities and behaviors work best for you. Your progress may be slow, but even a small amount of self-compassion can have a tremendous impact on your mental and emotional health.